Wednesday, January 30, 2013
"American women expect to find in their husbands a perfection that English women only hope to find in their butlers."
The Razor's Edge, Maugham
To demand reciprocation shows weakness of character, a trait of the in-genuine and most of all low self worth and a confused state of self confidence.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Saturday, January 26, 2013
"The things I remember most about those days, aside from the long hours I spent working, are the cockroaches...I'll never forget the humilation of bringing my portfolio up to Carmel Snow's office at Harpers Bazaar and unzipping it only to have a roach crawl out and down the leg of the table."
Thursday, January 24, 2013
"people have so many problems with love, always looking for someone to be their Via Veneto, their souffle that can't fall...
...peoples fantasies are what give them problems. If you didnt have fantasies you wouldnt have problems because youd just take whatever was there. But then you wouldnt have romance, because romance is finding your fantasy in people who dont have it."
Andy Warhol, The Philosophy of Andy Warhol
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Saturday, January 19, 2013
“I used to believe that love was a light switch. Something flicks on. You get an overwhelming sensation. It hits you like a bag of bricks. Or a strong arrow. When you know, you know. Right? Not so much. After 38 years and an expired marriage, I don’t see love that way anymore. I’ve placed Cupid right next to Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.
Love is a series of choices. The first choice is based on many many factors, including chemistry, principle, logic, humor, intelligence, body type, where we are in our lives, what we want / need… the list goes on and on, and the weight of each factor varies depending on the individual. Based on these factors, we either choose to begin the process to love or not. If we decide to enter this process, the action of loving can bring “light switch” moments. The way he looks at you. How hard she make you laugh. The notes he hides in your purse. The way she makes you feel when you don’t feel anything. But like an airplane flight, there is turbulence. The fights. The disagreements. The little things that bother you. His socks. Her shopping. You start wondering if you’ve made the right choice. Once you are in doubt, you have to make another choice. To continue to fly with this person or jump out of the plane. This choice is based on a thousand other factors, again depending on the individual and where they are in their journey..
...Love is making a choice every single day, to either love or not love. That’s it. It’s that simple. Either to continue the process or not. We fall in and out of love. Even in relationships, especially in relationships. This doesn’t mean we don’t love the person. It means we are left with a choice. There is a difference between feeling love for someone (caring about a person), and loving someone (choosing to love that person). You may have love for someone forever. But that doesn’t mean you choose to love that person forever. The choice to love is not a feeling, it is an action. That is why it is so difficult. It requires you to do something and I’m not just talking about buying flowers. It might mean putting your wants aside. Also, like chemistry, the ability to love is not a constant. It is a variable. It fluctuates, depending on where you’re at in your life and what you’re struggling with. Sometimes it is easy to love. Sometimes it is extremely difficult. But at the end of the day, it’s always a choice.
Although love varies, it also deepens. This means the longer you stay on that flight and embark on the journey together, the more fruit the process will bare. Your investment pays off. Your choices become easier. You not only become stronger as a couple, but also as individuals, assuming the love process is healthy – which means you guys are both doing work. The choice to love creates opportunity to hit notes in life that you could never hit alone and THIS is what makes your choice worth it.
So how do you know if it’s love? That is not the question to ask. The question is do you choose to love this person or not? Right now. Not tomorrow. Today. Make a choice. Yes or no. If the answer is yes, love as hard as you can. Love with everything you’ve got (your capacity right now at this point in your life)."
Love, Mophead (who, for the record, has never doubted and will always choose yes)
Sunday, January 13, 2013
"reality" is a concept borrowed from the theologians. We would do better to restrict ourselves to questions that can be answered. Such questions take the form "At this date, with the knowledge presently possessed by humanity, which model best accords with the facts?"
- Robert Anton Wilson, "Email to the Universe and other alterations of consciousness"